First Class Jerk

First Class Jerk

The “When In Rome” Hit List

Not a guide—just guidance! Roman recs from hotel, to corner bar, to souvenir.

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First Class Jerk
Jul 18, 2025
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Spanish Steps | Small World, Martin Parr

We’ve developed a special ‘talent’ for getting stuck in Rome.

Canceled flights, surprise layovers, frantic hotel scrambles—this is the trifecta that we’ve come to know more than once this year alone. Always unplanned…but never entirely unwelcome. Because if there’s any city worth being stranded in, it’s this one.

Nobody’s shedding tears for us over our travel woes—and they damn well shouldn’t! Even when it’s for work, an extra day or two in Rome will always feel like less of a mishap and more like the travel gods doing us a solid (we do believe in them).

So how do we fill our extended time? Walking the Spanish Steps. Hunting down the best carbonara. Closing down the lobby bar. Or even sprinting between hotels on a 100-degree day. That’s 38, for those of you who run on Celsius. We, however, run on Negronis.

All of this is to say that we’ve plenty of Roman escapades to draw from—both the ugly and the beautiful. So we figured we should share some favorites….from the two of us and a couple of confidential (but deeply trustworthy) sources.

As the title suggests, we’re here bearing guidance. Just guidance(!)—because as we’ve said before, we’re not exactly lovers of the colloquial travel guides that proclaim the best way to see a city. Spoiler: there is no such thing! This is Rome, for God’s sake. You can’t go wrong. Even if your visit descends into depravity, there are plenty of confessionals to make things right.

So that’s that. Here’s the good stuff…from hotel, to corner bar, to souvenir.


FOR SLEEPS

Hotel Hassler Roma // Historic and elevated. Literally—this place sits above the Spanish Steps and has been doing it since 1893. Classic interiors, the best of views, and the kind of quiet that only comes from real stature. Take your breakfast on your private terrace and pretend you live here (we would).

Bulgari Hotel Roma // Among our favorite interiors anywhere. Marble everything, vaulted ceilings, and a restrained luxury that feels tailored the Italian way (not loud). The location? Quiet, central, and overlooking the Mausoleum of Augustus.

The St. Regis Rome // Opulence in a hotel originally designed by César Ritz. Crystal chandeliers, dramatic frescoes, and—of course—nightly champagne sabering in the lobby. We’re not immune to ritual, and nor should you be.

Hotel de Russie // The Roman grand dame with its own not-so-secret garden. Well-located and elegantly elegant (not a typo). A favorite of actors, diplomats, and the kind of traveler who doesn’t need to post where they’re staying.

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